Mindset Makeover for Growing Your Dream
If you’re a reader that doesn’t know me, I’ve been pretty quiet on the blog and social media the last few months. I’ve been re-calibrating my life and work to be in full alignment with my authentic self and Truth.
I was growing more uncomfortable every time someone asked me “what do you do”.
What I “do” and practice is what I believe and that is something that started about 25 years ago when I sat in the doctor’s office and the doctor told me that I would never walk again. In that horrifying moment I heard a voice tell me not to believe those words.
Clearly, I’m out of the wheelchair and thriving. Since that day, I’ve followed that voice and what I do has evolved and grown into more than I could have imagined. I help people break through the obstacles that are getting in the way of designing and creating health, well-being, and lives of fulfillment. It’s our birthright, and what we came here to experience.
So with that being said I want to help you understand the role and importance of mindset when you are working on healing or changing an aspect of your life.
There’s a particular mindset already in place when we’re living with dis-ease or when we’re not able to get where it is we want to go.
It may seem a bit trite to declare that our mindset can change our circumstances.
I know if anyone had professed that to me when I was consumed by pain, I would have had a few expletives for them!
But, the first step is to get into the mindset of knowing what the Truth is.
If we focus our attention in the wrong area or direction, we won’t be able to create the transformation we’re looking for.
I’m also sharing some tips that led me out of extreme challenges and into freedom.
The Truth is… it all comes down to subconscious programming.
Honestly, I was stuck in so many areas of my life…before I learned how to get out of the “loop” of my subconscious programming and old mindsets.
The good news we don’t need anyone to move energy for us or to break free and create what it is we want.
We can learn the steps and tools and do it for ourselves! Yes, it puts full responsibility on ourselves but, this too, is the good news. Once we know the tools we can use them over and over whenever we feel stuck or realize there’s another layer to move through.
From the time we’re born, til we’re 7 years old, our subconscious mind is not fully developed and we don’t have the ability to reject what gets fed into our subconscious mind.
It doesn’t take much for our mind to be “set up” with faulty programming, especially if we live in an environment that teaches struggle. Most of the time it’s covert…we don’t even realize it happened. A lot of my clients tell me that they had a pretty “normal” childhood. But when we dig deeper we can see the exact program that is keeping them stuck.
In order to break through to what we want we have to get at the faulty programming and replace it.
Whether we’re trying to create wellness, a relationship, or a career we love… whatever was dumped into our subconscious mind is what needs to be taken out–in order for us to have a breakthrough.
Whatever we’re holding energetically and subconsciously is what’s creating the obstacles and the barriers. Without the reprogramming, we keep trying to break free but we find ourselves back in the same place, over and over again.
How do we create the new mindset and shift what we’re experiencing in our body and lives?
Honestly, a lot of the “new age” stuff doesn’t work.
I did it for YEARS! It didn’t work. And it wasn’t just me.
I know a lot of people talk about tapping, law of attraction, and other modalities…they’ve tried them and had little or no success. Thinking positive and visualizing didn’t work. I’ve been there and so have a lot of my clients.
What I’ve noticed is that it’s as if we are living two different lives when we are going through the re-programming phase.
There’s the “old life” we created, over in this other place before we break free, before we get to a new mindset and before we’re able to step into who we truly are.
The “old life” is like a great big canvas with all of the things we painted on that canvas from our old programming of the subconscious mind. Things got painted on the canvas from our old belief systems when we weren’t old enough to know better or reject them.
We can see clearly all the things that were challenging and difficult.
At the same time, we can also see a new canvas in front of us, our dream and desires. We’re standing there in this brand-new place, between the two paintings.
We feel like we’re ready to start putting new things on the blank canvas. And then, because we can’t see anything there, (and we’re often impatient), we often look back at the old canvas and start grabbing from there. Instead of waiting for the new programming to come through.
Our conscious mind says, “Hey, there’s nothing on this new canvas over here. I thought you said there was going to be something new and different over here. I thought you said everything I wanted was going to be “over here”.
What happens next is critical! Your conscious mind will try to trick you.
We’ve become so accustomed to everything that’s splattered on the old canvas we can get tricked into thinking that it’s better to stay over there. Because, at least we can see something familiar.
It seems way too risky to step fully in front of the new canvas and wait for it to get filled up.
This is when we start thinking about going back to that old relationship that didn’t work the first time. Or we decide not to leave our job to build our new business.
The blank canvas scares us.
We haven’t figured out what needs to go there. The old subconscious programming can’t go there–we know it doesn’t serve us.
Yet, at the same time, we’re afraid to choose.
We don’t trust ourselves to choose. Because, just look at that old canvas. We fill ourselves with doubt not realizing that everything on that old canvas was chosen for us, by our early subconscious programming.
We find ourselves circling in the loop. We want to move forward to paint a new canvas but we don’t trust ourselves. So we circle back around to the old one. We take a look at the old one and cringe…and so, the loop continues.
Right here, standing between the two canvases we are in full, 100% choice and responsibility, whether we realize it or not.
We can choose what goes on that new canvas. We just can’t choose from the old mindset.
What happens for a lot of us? We stand in front of the new canvas and feel tremendous discomfort at the thought of trusting ourselves. It sends us running back to our undesired, old canvas, just because it feels recognizable.
Instead, we can choose to get comfortable, with the discomfort, in front of the new canvas.
We can’t rush this. There is no “hurry up, hurry up, hurry up” when were creating a new mindset.
It is a process!
We were in the old mindset for YEARS!
Now we’re in between “no longer and not yet”
This is the period of re-calibration.
Anyone who has moved through it will tell you, we can’t see it when we’re in it.
I wanted to smack one of my coaches right through the phone when she told me I couldn’t rush through it.
That’s why I find it helps to have a mentor or coach to support us during this phase.
It can feel scary and even more difficult than the struggle we’re leaving behind. Either way, we have to take the time to clear out the old subconscious programming.
For some, it happens more quickly than others.
Many factors determine how fast we’ll move through it. I’ve found those that experience the most resistance are folks who get held in place by family members who were a part of the original programming.
If only it were as simple as reprogramming the default hard drive of our PC and hitting re-boot.
When we find ourselves stuck in that never-ending loop unable to achieve results, chances are there’s a “core wound” buried in our subconscious programming. No amount of xanax, prozac, red wine, or oreo cookies is going to correct it. Sorry!
When a “core wound” hasn’t been identified or addressed every action we take is rooted in the programming from that core wound.
We will do anything to protect ourselves. Even if it means going back to the old canvas when we know it’s not good for us. It’s a false sense of safety and security. And yet, the blank canvas doesn’t feel right either.
This is the very cause and root of energy imbalances like anxiety and depression. It’s also the cause of most stress-related health problems.
The core wound causes symptoms in the body. It’s running the show and we’re doing everything we can to avoid feeling the discomfort. Our mindset is stuck in the struggle of protecting the wound.
It brings us back to playing it safe.
The way out of the vicious cycle is to get comfortable with standing in front of the blank canvas and slowly, consciously choosing what is going to go on the new canvas. It’s okay to take our time to choose what’s going on that canvas.
It ain’t gonna happen in a weekend. I don’t care what anybody says. I saw someone offering a one-day workshop for soulful self-mastery. Really? In one day?
It takes some time, right, to fill up your soul?
I’ve found it takes a bit of time to disarm the inner critic.
The inner critic was born when the subconscious mind was unwillingly being programmed. It learned to protect you. It says, “don’t say this, don’t do that, be careful, don’t speak up, it’s not okay, you’re not safe.”
Here we are trying to break through to new things we want. Meanwhile our inner critic is circling in our mind…”it’s not safe over here you better keep your day job. You need the paycheck. You’re not good enough. You’re not smart enough.”
We start to hear remnants of what was programmed into us when we were a kid–limitations and beliefs we were fed as a child. Whatever our parents told us was safe, good, or right, or what wasn’t.
When these old tapes are active nothing works in our favor, no matter how much we visualize.
We can visualize our dreams all day long but if our inner critic and subconscious mind are running our default program, we’re stuck in the “safety” zone of what we don’t desire.
We can visualize a different future but nothing within our physical body-mind is on board with it.
Nothing is on board when our inner critic is right over our shoulder telling us why it’s not safe, not okay, to follow our dream.
Our conscious brain tries to wrap around all the chatter, changes, and noise.
But our subconscious brain keeps telling us, “you’re not safe, don’t do it, be quiet, keep quiet, don’t be seen.”
And there is the birth of anxiety and a whole slew of stress-related health problems.
We’ll stop every time we get to a certain point. That’s what I did. Every time I got to a certain point I’d slide back down to where I started.
When and where does the breakthrough finally happen?
When we disarm our core wounds and the inner critic.
We have to stop being in agreement with our inner critic.
I agree to stop being in agreement with my inner critic.
So, today, take a few minutes to write down what it is that you’re trying to achieve. Ask yourself, “where do I stop?”
The answer to that question is where you need to reprogram your subconscious beliefs.
What gets you to stop?
What does the inner critic say to you to get you to stop?
It’s the voice of our inner critic that we agree with and we have to make an agreement with ourselves to disarm it. Choose to make a conscious effort to stop agreeing with it. In my Year of Creation program I teach clients how to create new programming that is in alignment with their desires.
If you’d like to be supported to break through old programming, getting unstuck, and create your personal plan to experience more freedom in your body and fulfillment in your life… I invite you to email me at Martha@marthablessing.com to schedule a complimentary strategy session today.